We don't have to talk a woman into having sex.
Women love sex too, they actually WANT sex as much as men.
Only problem is they deal with cultural stuff surrounding sex. More than us. You know, being seen as a "slut." For us, someone calls us that, it's almost a compliment.
Why the double-standard?
Women are seen as the "guardians" of sex. I mean, if a woman doesn't open the "door" to us and we don't get entry. Even though she's got the SAME EXACT desires we have, if she opens the "door" too easily, she gets chastised, ostracized.
At least that's the story. But to what extent is that story meant to "control" women?
A woman's sexuality is like an ocean. It's large, powerful, flowing, changing, receptive. Men take a dip inside and come out limp. Not to mention her sexuality can bring the strongest of us to our knees. Hello Samson. And then of course there are the husbands who've historically worried whether his children really are his.
So, to what extent is that word "slut" meant to control women's sexuality? 'Cause I don't see why women can't enjoy the same freedom to enjoy sex as we do.
Agree with me, disagree with me. I don't care. My point is this.
One big reason women SEEM like they're not into sex as much as us is because they have the social consequences to deal with. As well as pregnancy consequences. And even emotional consequences (sex is often an emotional experience for women).
They hide their desires.
Doesn't mean they don't want it. 'Cause they do. Oh, man do they. They just have more stuff to deal with around it than we do. They don't want to be judged, so they hide it.
"No, no, no, no," I hear someone saying. "I've been with my wife for twelve years and she won't give me any. How do you explain that?"
Hey, if she has sex out of obligation... Or if sex isn't fun or pleasurable... of course she won't want it. But if she ENJOYS the sex... why would anyone NOT want something that's pleasurable?
Still don't believe me? Look at a book like Nancy Friday's "Secret Garden."
Read that and you soon see how CRAZY sexual women are.
Not only that, you see a theme. A lot of women's fantasies have to do with being "dominated," "ravaged," and "taken." You realize, women don't just love sex, they "love to get taken" (as seen in the book)
What does that mean?
#1. Don't Be Judgmental.
Never EVER pass judgment on her sexuality. It's GREAT that she's sexual! Love it. Let her be free. Make her feel comfortable letting go and being so sexual with you.
The more comfortable she is letting go (because she knows you won't judge her), the more comfortable she'll be to unleash the sexual BEAST inside of her.
And really... Is there anything more beautiful than a woman in ecstasy? I know. Of course there isn't.
#2. Attitude -- She Wants You
You already have what she wants. You have a cock. She wants that, man.
So, you never have to talk a woman into sex. You never have to kiss her ass. You never have to spend loads of money in order to "get" sex from her.
After you make her feel comfortable with sex, all you've gotta do is turn her on. Believe me, she'll want it then.
Well how do you do that?
#3. GIve Her Sex She ENJOYS
Turn on her mind. Her mind is her largest sex organ. Turn on her mind, and her body will follow.
That means physical sex techniques won't turn her on alone. You've gotta also use psychological sex techniques. Those are even more important.
What are psychological sex techniques? Turning on her mind. Meaning...
- First, you've gotta shut off the "slut" threat inside her, and make her feel comfortable giving herself to you. One prime way to make her feel comfortable: massages. Give her a massage. Even better? A leg and foot massage. Most guys, including myself, forget to massage a woman's lower body. But relaxing her lower body goes a loooong way to relaxing her whole body.
- Second, you've gotta make her feel beautiful and sexy and desirable. That means getting completely and totally turned on by her. In addition, she's gotta feel liked not just for her looks, but for her as a HUMAN BEING. Complicated? Check.
- Third, you've gotta spend plenty of time with foreplay. Her second biggest sex organ is her skin all over. Her va-jay-jay comes in third place. So, spend time exploring her skin all over before touching her sexual bits and pieces. This teases her, and turns her mind on even more.
Man, let me tell you. She'll be wet and BEGGING you for sex. Ha!
#4. TAKE her.
But you don't always have to make "sweet love" to her.
Of course women enjoy that. But once you've got the water boiling, women ALSO love getting raunchy, animalistic, naughty. They love dirty talk, being taboo, being dominated.
Women are horny, man, HORNY.
Well, how do you "take" her?
- Talk dirty
- Make noise (be expressive, not just silent)
- Pull her hair
- Pin her hands behind her head
- Slap her ass
- Feel her breasts
- Pick her up
- Bend her over
- Throw her on the bed
- Give it to her HARD
GET IN TOUCH WITH THE ANIMAL WITHIN. Dominate her. ENJOY her.
Now, ladies come first. It's the gentlemanly thing to do.
But I even hesitate writing that. I mean, definitely let a girl come before you. And if you come before she does, make sure to take care of your girl. But great sex isn't just about the orgasm. A TOY can make her come for God's sakes.
Great sex is more about paying attention to her.
And connecting with her. It's like the old saying: the journey's more important than the destination. Let me tell you a quick story about this.
I had sex with this BEAUTIFUL girl who eventually became my girlfriend. One night we were reminiscing about the first time we had sex. I'll never forget what she said: "I don't even remember whether I had an orgasm or not, but I just remember the sex being REALLY good."
Why? I had paid attention to her.
Now, there were other times I had sex with her and tried too hard to give her orgasm. And you know what? She DID have an orgasm. But the sex wasn't as good. Go figure.
So, orgasms are cool but even more important to having great sex: paying attention to the way her body responds moment-to-moment, rapport, making her feel beautiful and liked as a human being. AND also TAKING her, DESIRING her, ENJOYING her.
Then after it's all done, making her feel beautiful.
Yes, again. "I can't hold you close enough"... a satisfying ending will ensure she'll be coming back to you for more.
My point it simple. She WANTS sex and she WANTS to be taken. So TAKE her!
Unleash her ocean of sexuality. And make her feel good about it along the way.