Six Characteristics of an Alpha Male, By Mystery

1. “Smile."

"The number one characteristic of an alpha male is the smile. Smile when you enter a room. As soon as you walk in a club, the game is on. And by smiling, you look like you’re together, you’re fun, and you’re somebody."

2. “Be well-groomed.”

  • Shower: Wash yourself three times before you meet a woman. Dirt and odors usually don't come off with just a rinse.
  • Breath: Brush your teeth. Carry breath mints and gum.
  • Scent: Use a good deodorant. Use cologne sparingly. A DAB on pulse places like wrists or neck. Best to put it on 30-60 minutes ahead of time so it blends with your natural scent.
  • Hair: get a cool hair style. Keep all other hair trimmed. Nose and ear hairs are a no-no. May want to keep the pubes trimmed too.
  • Nails: keep 'em short, clean, and neat. Later, during foreplay, you'll want them short.
  • Fashion: wear at least one interesting item of clothing. It can entice girls to open you. At the very least, dress the best you can.

3. “Possess a sense of humor.”

Banter, cocky-funny, role-playing, negs are all great techniques to make women laugh in a way that sparks sexual tension.

4. “Connect with people.”

Get curious about people, and listen. At bottom, everyone wants to feel important, so don’t knock people down. Make them feel important. Show everyone respect.

5. “Be the social center of a room.”

See “The Key To Picking Up Chicks Is Not Picking Them Up” for more. Mystery says “there are the observers and the observed. Be the observed.” The three second rule isn’t just opening the first attractive women you see. It means opening the first people you see. Period. Talk to everyone, even if it’s a simple “How’s your night going?” Bartenders, Bouncers, ugly girls, guys. Be the social center of a room.

6. “Confidence.”

Confidence comes from competence. Competence comes from practice. Also, adopt the belief that you’re the prize. You’re the selector. The belief translates into confidence. And women will smell it off you like cologne.

You can find these six characteristics in “The Game” by Neil Strauss (page 21-22).

And you can begin practicing these characteristics RIGHT NOW.

For example, smile at people. Ask the cashier “how’s your day going?” Even practice a banter-line on her and make her laugh. You’ll be on your way to developing confidence, and the characteristics of an alpha male.

4 Responses

  1. I see all of these points,but isn`t a true alpha male doing the things HE wants to do and doing the things HE stands for? He smiles if he wants to but looks angry if he is,too. He is funny if he wants to but can act very serious,too. He connects with people if he wants to and tell others to go away,too. He is the social center when he wants to but can also only listen,too. In my opinion a alpha male doesn`t copy another system, others rules or another person otherwise he wouldn`t be alpha he would be a cheap copy.He has got his own rules.That is my point.Trying to be or to act like an alpha is ultimately making you beta and also a poor try-hard.And so thousands of men try to act like an alpha male.And all the women can sense this right from the beginning through endless incongruencies and reject the men left and right because they are so tired of this and because these men are so low value at their core that they have to be an actor.Women have at least more respect for men who are honest.Maybe they are not an alpha male (yet),but they are one o two steps further than all the actors and are at least their authentic selves (attractive alpha male quality,too).By the way, acting all the time and not being able to let go and to be in the moment is not so much fun,too. greetz Erwin
    • Where does it say in this post to "act," i.e. not be authentic, or "copy" others' s systems/rules, or generally be "dishonest"? Oh that's right. NO WHERE. Second point. I agree it's important to do things on your terms rather than trying to get a "gold star." But where do you draw the line at having a complete disregard for people like a self-absorbed prick (which your description at the beginning borders on sounding like)? The point I was trying to make is an alpha is someone who leads not by cutting others down but by lifting them up. Third point. No one is born a concert pianist or a master carpenter or a master pickup artist or even an alpha male. We all have to start somewhere. What's wrong with adopting the characteristics of an alpha male, learning from the greats, as training wheels until they become a part of you? Oh, right. Nothing. Because that's how we all learn.
      • Okay, first of all i want to thank you very much! Why? Because you gave me an answer.Really! I wrote some other mails to so called PUA Gurus and didn`t get an answer.Maybe because the content of these mails were not only meant to give compliments all over the place.I try to have a really interesting discussion with people who have studied this subject for years,too.And everybody can join it.That´s why I wrote a little more provocative. I study psychology for 7 years and want to write my PhD thesis about attraction. So now to the juicy part.And it`s not anymore about being alpha or not.It´s about the whole concepts.I`m sure that you all have read many books of other PUAs and know many philosophies about attraction of others,too.In my opinion it`s important to always compare these different views and to pick the best material of all of them.This is not as easy as it sounds because there is not only one truths there are many different of them and many are right.For instance direct vs. indirect.Both methods are right but the question one could ask is which method is percental more effectively an therefore stronger and under which circumstances.Herein lies a huge problem because all PUA teachers want to be unique with sometimes only one idea at the core of there methods.And nobody is official comparing and proving these PUA techniques.And there is no official and fair discussion between these PUA stars. I`m a big fan of Mysterys work and even if there are many denier of his ideas i still feel that he really says what he is thinks and that he is right with his points.His work is based on science and I truly believe that his described mechanisms (S&R Value)are true for all human beings.But since 1 year I became a little sceptical about how to get to this stage of life were these rules for high value in social dynamics are part of your authentic self.And I thought more than twice if there are behaviours which are even more powerful than these concepts are.Nowadays there are many convincing theories about attraction which are proclaiming a pure natural style i.e. complete honesty with yourself and with women and an unconsciouss behaviour. I don`t want to call names,but there are for instance experts who say that picking up women has little to do with routines,gambits or pick up skills. Could it be that an average looking but confident guy is getting as much numbers and pick ups as a trained PUA ? And it`s all about to have the balls to only show up? Could it be that a PUA student is getting results because he thinks that he has the necessary skills and is therefore more confident to approach?And women sense that he is using some techniques but give him a chance anyway because at least he came over to them?At this point the student rationalizes that his tactics work but what if these tactics were not the key at all?Some say that the most attractive quality you can have is authenticity. And now we come to my first mail and your answer. Of course nobody said to be a prick and to be dishonest.You wrote nice meant tips.It`s okay.And I also didn`t write to be an asshole either.And by the way ,did I write to have a complete disregard for people by smiling if you want to.No,I didn`t. You can`t deny that things like negs,role-playing etc.etc. are at least recommendations or in my opinion good hearted requests.But all these little or bigger requests in themselves are proclaiming a change in acting.A change in acting is like having a script of what to do (and by the way there are even things like routines and storytelling which you are recommending ,too).And who is having a script?Right an actor. Nobody is born a master.That`s complete right.But why not trying to improve your real self rather than hiding behind a mask of fake behaviour.Improving your core self by acting on your own desires and therefore to push your boundaries in social situations is another way to go and to become more confident (confidence + authenticity=ultimately attractive).This is a long way to master,too.But it`s more rewarding because at the end you know that YOU (your authenitc self) are enough to attract women not your act. Okay,I wrote enough but at the end I want you to know that my writings are well meant,too.You should know that I defend your methods if i argue with other "experts",too.I´m still searching for a perfect fusion of different methods and belief that the key lies in so called inner game and in your estimation of the world. I thank you for your insights and articles and hope for an interesting answer by you.Thanks! With best regards, Erwin
  2. Hey Erwin, My apologies for the delayed response. Didn't see you had replied until just now. First of all, thanks for the kind words. And there's nothing wrong with being a little provocative. In fact, that's very welcome. And writing a dissertation on attraction sounds way cool. You bring up good points about natural game. I'm convinced the term "natural game" is nothing but a marketing gimmick. When you check out the innovators of natural game, like Vin DiCarlo and Richard LaRuina (Gambler), you'll see they're not natural at all. They're super theoretical. They also began as students of Mystery and base a lot of their stuff on his teachings. My suspicion is they coined "natural game" to carve out a niche for themselves to attract customers. What it ended up doing is just confusing guys who just want to get this pert of their lives handled. Let me give you an analogy so you can see what I'm saying. At the heart of losing weight is a pretty simple idea. Exercise, eat healthy, eat less calories than you burn. It's a basic. But how many fad diets do you see out there, saying they have the "new" solution? They use the word "new" because they know people are drawn to it like flies to light. But when you get down to it, these "new" diets are just a repackaging of that one simple idea. Pickup companies do the same exact thing to attract money. Mystery discovered some fundamentals of pickup and attraction. Many pickup companies repackage his ideas saying "don't learn routines, just be natural." Then they turn around and still use Mystery's basic ideas of being dominant, teasing, qualifying, building comfort, save seducing for the last phase. Speaking of routines, you brought up some interesting issues about authenticity and using routines. You're right, there might be a danger on relying too much on routines. It can become like that pound of makeup girls put on to make them seem more attractive than they really are. However, to say "just be authentic" is so abstract, it becomes meaningless. Don't you think? It's like saying "just be yourself." Okay. Still don't know what to do. I'll tell you what's changed my inner-game was not just reading a bunch of books on inner-game. It was getting out into the field and practicing the outer-game. The outer-game change my inner-game. Like practicing the outer-game of karate might transform the inner-game of a karate student. The pain and burn challenged me and helped my self-awareness. Again, it's like a piano student learning the "routines" that Mozart and Beethoven wrote. Or the art student who imitates the artworks of Leonardo and Michelangelo. Or the writing student imitating the style of his favorite author. He might be copying their "routines" but by modeling them he's also discovering his own style in the process. That's what learning Mystery's routines and methods have done for me. By PRACTICING them I've grown (and still am growing) as a man from the inside out.

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